婚姻再好,女人也要經濟獨立

前幾天檸檬突然打電話告訴我,她有可能要離婚了,哭哭啼啼和我說了半天。我一頭霧水,她和她老公一向感情蠻好的哇,離婚這件事怎麼也不可能到她頭上。

聽著檸檬連續不斷的抽泣,我約她到附近的一家咖啡店見面。我剛到,檸檬的眼淚就像不斷線的珠子一個勁兒的掉。我安慰她別忙著哭,想把事情講清楚。

在一直卡帶的敘述中,我才明白,原來她的老公出軌了!檸檬翻看他手機看到的兩人兩人聊天記錄,當場撕逼翻臉要離婚,哪想到她老公一句話沒挽留,離就離。這下把檸檬嚇壞了,畢竟還有一個尚在嗷嗷待哺的幼兒,她一個人可怎麼養活。

我問:你難道連一點積蓄都沒有嗎?“我每天都是在家帶孩子,老公他在外面工作,我哪有時間上班。”檸檬很委屈的抱怨。我想,檸檬離婚不怕,怕的是自己沒有經濟基礎,怕離了這個男人,就會無法生存。

因為經濟不獨立,所以所有牽扯到經濟問題的,檸檬都只能是被動。因為她沒有錢,因為她知道生存下去很難,因為她知道她一個人是養活不起孩子的。

這一切的被動,都是因為檸檬沒有個人的經濟獨立。換句話說,如果檸檬經濟獨立了,那她可以很瀟灑的say goodbye,而不是現在的“反過來求著出軌方:“別離婚。”

一份好的婚姻,會給你的家庭帶來幸福。但不代表這個溫暖的小窩,一輩子都不會有小風小浪。如果想要度過每次的小風小浪,就要做好安全設備的儲備。當然,丈夫作為一家之主,設備的掌控權大部分在他手裡,但是不代表你就不用甚至是你就不能有基礎的救生工具。

別總是說什麼“他是最愛我的人,他是最珍惜我的人”,在真正死神面前,人性是經不起考驗的,更何況我們只是芸芸眾生最普通的萬分之一。

嗯,自己有個救生工具有什麼用?就是在危險來臨的時候,我們不用狼狽的像條狗去等著你老公遲遲不來的救贖。自己有個救生工具,就是什麼大風大浪面前,你都能很好的確定以及有一個安全的環境,從而不畏懼什麼。

最重要的是,你不用再委屈自己,委屈自己卑躬屈膝的承受著。你有了自己的資本,也就是你可以隨意灑脫的資本。就算你老公不救你,你也不會因生命危險而苦苦哀求。無所謂,本宮自己可以!

一次大風大浪看清一個人,值了,要走就早點走,離開你我希望能活,甚至是過得更好。不可能?為什麼不可能?我有任性的資本。

周圍很多女生嫁給了家境不錯的男方以後,就徹底的退隱江湖了,每天的事情就是帶孩子做飯,做飯帶孩子。很久很久都沒有再去做自己喜歡的事情。而這個時候的自己其實已經成了全面依附于老公的女人,因為經濟由老公決定。而你,只是個刷鍋洗碗加掃地的保姆。

時間久了,你唯一會的技能也不會了,也不再去琢磨今年流行什麼顏色,也不去約上好友小啜。因為你這個人,已經和家庭緊緊聯繫,你的全部都成了家庭的公用品。家成了你依附的地方,離開了家,你有可能連個去的處所都沒有。

而當你逐漸發福的身材被老公嫌棄,逐漸看去的容顏被老公挑剔時,你什麼都做不了,唯一能做的只是:還不都是為了這個家。抱歉,男人很少聽你這些“真心話”。

女人的經濟獨立重要在哪裡:
出去逛街時,看到自己喜歡的衣服,可以放心的買買買,而不是擔心自己回去怎麼和老公交代這件衣服花了1000多;和朋友出去聚會時,可以為自己來一次舒心的旅程,而不會因為旅遊費用而卑躬屈膝的伸手向老公拿;老公出軌時,可以灑脫的說一句:給老娘滾!而不是跪在地上苦苦哀求:別丟下我們母子,我們會活不下去。

經濟獨立,你可以為自己做精緻的指甲,穿高貴的衣服,享受別人無法享受的“富養”。最重要的是,這一切你都可以享受的心安理得。這一切你都享受的發自內心的愜意。

有一份好的婚姻很好,但是別把家庭當做你生活的全部全部。要知道給自己一份單獨生存的後路,要知道有生之年讓自己歡喜比什麼都來的重要。

什麼樣的女人氣色最好?婚姻幸福的。什麼樣的女人是最自信的?經濟獨立的。

About terence0425leung

哲人無憂,智者常樂。並不是因為所愛的一切他都擁有了,而是所擁有的一切他都愛。
本篇發表於 未分類。將永久鏈結加入書籤。

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